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Charitable organizations such as American Red Cross and UNICEF may be making the world healthier, but the pioneering Web site myfreeimplants.com is making the world happier and boobier.
It all started with a trip to Las Vegas. Three buddies decided to try to get their friend the breast implants she had always dreamed of, according to the site's press kit. After raising $750 by asking for donations at a bachelor party, they decided to start a Web site so men all over the world could support her silicone dreams and raise the rest of the money needed.
With some good old-fashioned entrepreneurial spirit and a twisted sense of "charity" myfreeimplants.com was born.
Women create accounts with profiles, pictures, blogs and chats. Men, known as "benefactors," are allowed to purchase message credits that are used to contact the women. The woman gets the amount of credits sent in the message, and she is allowed to message back, without charge.
I like that the men have to pay to be able to talk to the women and the women can message whomever they want whenever they want for free. If only this were true in real life. A man has to send you two bucks every time he wants to text you. I wouldn't even need a job anymore.
Once a woman collects the amount of money she needs for her desired procedure, she picks a doctor, has the surgery and graduates from the site.
While the feminist in me is screaming over the audacity that these men have to assume every woman needs a boob job, I can understand how they condone it.
Just as planting a tree is seen as making the world more beautiful, these men are implanting silicone and making the world sexier and more confident. However, even this argument assumes all people love boobs and think bigger equals sexier, which simply isn't true.
While the creators of this site certainly did not make the stereotype and ridiculous "ideal" body image for a woman, they may be accused of perpetuating it.
You have to hand it to them, it's a brilliant idea. The women really want boob jobs, and there are plenty of men who would love to donate to that cause. All this site is doing is allowing them to meet and get something they want.
So far, the site has paid for 300 breast augmentations worldwide, according to its press kit, and that's no small number.
The reasons the women give for their discontentment varies wider than one might think. Not all of the women on the site are total surfboards looking to become Pamela Anderson. A number of them are looking for reshaping and even simple corrections for previous surgeries gone awry.
A breast augmentation can do wonderful things for a woman's image, confidence and self-esteem. Who's to say these men should be chastised for donating to such a worthy cause?
My one concern about this site is its safety. Women are allowed, but not required, to post nude pictures and even send videos over this site. Because of this freedom, donors can withhold contributions and demand something in return before giving to the cause.
They often request "custom photo sets" and could just as easily request nude photos, and even amateur porn-style videos from the women. Depending on the level of desperation the woman feels about reaching her monetary goal, she could be pressured into engaging in this type of "cyber-prostitution" and doing things she would not normally do.
If these women are already bold enough to take sexy pictures of themselves and chat with total creepers online just to earn enough money to buy a boob job - and probably attract even more creepers as a result - who knows where their moral standards are, anyway?
Women: Go for it. If you really want to be mostly plastic, be my guest. It doesn't hurt me any. In fact, I may even get to be there when your little silicone bag bursts and your boob deflates and drains in the middle of the airport. No worries, I'll only laugh a little.
As for you men: Good job. You've successfully found a way to satisfy your own boob lust while engaging in a charitable act. You're not only helping women feel better about themselves, but you're making the plastic surgeons a ton of money, which may even help the economy - if only it were that simple.
Boob jobs may not be the saving grace for the economy, but they certainly are making women around the world a little more confident, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that.
Jen Siino can be reached at jsiino@theorion.com
MyFreeImplants: Something For Nothing Video from YouTube
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