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(530): I just realized funny blogs do not require pants to read. I can’t really say the same about any of my in-class assignments.
We all have guilty pleasures. Most of mine revolve around the recent trend of funny blogs and Web sites that showcase unfortunate-looking Wal-Mart shoppers, pictures of gluttonous masterpieces and snapshots of silly kitties with intentionally misspelled captions.
Other recent anecdotal blogs and Web sites are gaining popularity by compiling ridiculous moments captured in pictures or writing that sucks you in, eventually ridding you of any chance at being productive. Taking a moment to realize how ridiculous other people’s lives are makes me feel a whole lot better about whatever I did last night to make my jeans smell like nachos.
To anyone who has experienced a “walk of shame,” eaten over 2,000 calories in one meal or been behind an overweight man in pink spandex at Wal-Mart, cheers, I salute you.
It’s no surprise college students are flooding their Facebook pages with text message quotes such as “(256): She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.” These hilarious nuggets of misfortune give us a look into the utter obscurity of situations gone terribly wrong — or extremely well in some cases. “(312): I remember going home with two girls. Woke up with four.”
Why wear pants in public when you can use a garbage bag? These photos of mostly unsuspecting Wal-Mart shoppers are guaranteed to inflate your self-esteem bubble to Spencer Pratt levels. Whether it is the kindly fellow with a beard and rather large breasts or the elderly woman shopping in a prom dress, this magic Web site makes you instantly feel more attractive.
Cats are probably the dumbest animals on the face of the earth, yet, they provide me with so much entertainment that I could stare at them for hours. And I do. This site originated from a photo of a pudgy grey cat tilting its head to the side with its mouth gaped open and the caption, “I Can Has Cheezburger?” It seems to me cats would talk this way if they could speak. Silly “kittehs.”
Grab your left arm as you gaze in amazement at these myocardial marvels that would make Paula Deen proud. As a man who made his own bacon-infused vodka, I drool at the sight of the bacon nachos topped with cheese curds, french fries and egg, all smothered in gravy. And all hail the “Turbaconucken,” which is a marvel made with a chicken, stuffed inside of a duck, stuffed inside of a turkey, all wrapped in bacon.
If you think your family photos are uncomfortable and inconceivable without a few drinks, a quick reality check can be seen at this site. A glorious reoccurring theme here is ’80s hair and epic mustaches. Strong cocktails pair well with these photos.
There are a lot of stupid people on the Internet and, fortunately for us, a lot of those people post their ridiculous questions on to Yahoo Answers for the whole world to see. I really want to party with the person who asked, “Why won’t my parakeet eat my diarrhea?” Remember when your mother told you there are no such things as stupid questions? She was wrong. And she is stupid for telling you that.
Whether I’m sitting at home, between classes or even in class for that matter, these blogs provide some much-needed comic relief.
Tyler Harbaugh can be reached at
tharbaugh@theorion.com
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